Former England captain Lewis Moody has announced he has been found to have motor neurone disease and acknowledged he cannot yet face the full implications of the muscle-degenerating condition that took the lives of fellow rugby players Doddie Weir and Rob Burrow.
The 47-year-old, who was a member of the 2003 championship side and lifted multiple English and European titles with Leicester, gave an interview to BBC Breakfast 14 days after discovering he has the disease.
"There's an element of confronting what lies ahead and being reluctant to completely absorb that at the present time," he stated.
"It isn't that I am unaware of where it's heading. We grasp that. But there is definitely a hesitation to face what's ahead for now."
Moody, conversing with his wife Annie, says instead he feels "at ease" as he focuses on his present welfare, his family and getting ready for when the condition deteriorates.
"Perhaps that's trauma or maybe I process things differently, and when I have the information, it's easier," he added.
Initial Indications
Moody learned he had MND after observing some reduced power in his shoulder while working out in the gym.
After rehabilitation failed to improve the problem, a number of scans showed nerve cells in his neurological system had been affected by MND.
"You're presented with this condition identification of MND and we're appropriately quite moved about it, but it's so strange because I feel like nothing's wrong," he added.
"I don't sense unwell. I don't feel poorly
"My indications are very minor. I have a bit of muscle deterioration in the hand area and the shoulder.
"I continue to be capable of doing whatever I want. And with luck that will carry on for as long as is attainable."
Condition Development
MND can develop rapidly.
According to the organization MND Association, the illness takes the lives of a 33% of people within a year and above half within 730 days of diagnosis, as eating and respiration become harder.
Treatment can only delay worsening.
"It's not me that I experience sorrow for," commented an moved Moody.
"It's about the sadness around having to break the news to my mum - as an sole offspring - and the ramifications that has for her."
Family Consequences
Speaking from the residence with his wife and their family dog by his side, Moody was overwhelmed by feeling when he mentioned informing his sons - 17-year Dylan and 15-year-old Ethan - the devastating news, saying: "This was the most difficult thing I've ever had to do."
"They're two excellent boys and that was rather devastating," Moody said.
"We positioned ourselves on the settee in tears, Ethan and Dylan both wrapped up in each other, then the dog jumped over and started removing the drops off our faces, which was quite amusing."
Moody explained the emphasis was remaining in the now.
"There exists no cure and that is why you have to be so intensely concentrated on just welcoming and appreciating everything now," he stated.
"As my wife mentioned, we've been very blessed that the only real determination I made when I retired from playing was to spend as much time with the kids as possible. We can't reclaim those years back."
Athlete Connection
Professional sportspeople are excessively impacted by MND, with studies indicating the prevalence of the disease is up to 600% elevated than in the broader public.
It is considered that by limiting the O2 obtainable and creating damage to neural pathways, frequent, intense exercise can trigger the disease in those previously genetically susceptible.
Sports Playing Days
Moody, who won 71 England appearances and traveled with the British and Irish Lions in New Zealand in 2005, was called 'Mad Dog' during his professional days, in honour of his brave, unwavering approach to the game.
He played through a stress fracture of his leg for a duration with Leicester and once initiated a workout scuffle with colleague and friend Martin Johnson when, annoyed, he left a tackle pad and began participating in physical contacts.
After entering as a substitute in the Rugby World Cup final win over Australia in 2003, he claimed a ball at the rear of the set piece in the crucial moment of play, creating a platform for half-back Matt Dawson to attack and Jonny Wilkinson to kick the game-deciding field goal.
Assistance Network
Moody has earlier informed Johnson, who skippered England to that victory, and a couple of other former players about his medical situation, but the others will be finding out his news with the broader public.
"There shall be a moment when we'll need to rely on their backing but, at the minute, just having that type of affection and acceptance that people are there is what's important," he commented.
"This game is such a excellent family.
"I told to the kids the other day, I've had an extraordinary life.
"Even when it ended now, I've valued all of it and accepted all of it and got to do it with remarkable people.
"Being able to consider your love your career, it's one of the greatest blessings.
"Achieving this for so considerable a time with the squads that I did it with was a delight. And I am aware they will want to help in every way they can and I await having those conversations."
